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Not sure what you want? Here are some important questions you can ask yourself.
Have you ever wondered why some people seem to have a clear direction while others wander aimlessly? The secret often lies in understanding one’s life purpose. “What do I want to do with my life?” is a question we all ask ourselves at some point. Whether contemplating a career change or embarking on a personal development journey, discovering your life purpose can be the key to unlocking genuine happiness and fulfillment. Let’s discuss some of the questions you might ask yourself to find your answer.
What makes you happy?
Happiness is a deeply personal and often elusive experience. While happiness can vary widely among individuals, understanding what happiness means to you is crucial to finding your life purpose. We all want happiness. When we pursue activities and goals that make us happy, we align ourselves with our true desires and interests. This alignment can increase motivation, productivity, and a more meaningful life. When figuring out what we want, we ask ourselves what makes us happy.
For some, it may be the thrill of adventure and new experiences. In contrast, it might be the comfort of routine and stability for others. Reflect on moments when you felt pleased and try to identify common themes.
For example, what do we like to do? When are we the happiest? Who are we with when we are the happiest? What goals bring a smile to our faces? What kind of life would help you do these things and feel this way more often?
Read More:Â Happiness Starts With Your E-Book
What are your needs?
When looking for a direction toward life purpose, it can be helpful to ask ourselves which needs are most important to us. Now, be careful not to confuse needs with wants. We might want a million dollars, while we might need financial security. We might like the perfect partner, but we might need one who loves and treats us well. While both may contribute to your happiness, the former addresses a fundamental need.
In contrast, the latter is a desire that may not impact your overall well-being. Food, shelter, and security are essential needs for survival and well-being. Conversely, wants are desires or aspirations that enhance our lives but are not necessary for survival.
According to Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, social/love and self-esteem needs are prioritized over self-actualization—or living up to our full potential. Other needs—like competence, autonomy, and relatedness—are also thought to be keys to well-being and living a good life (Reis et al., 2000). Identifying your needs can help you make more informed decisions and prioritize what truly matters.
What are your values?
Values serve as guiding principles that help us move forward in ways that matter to us (Roccas et al., 2002). They often reflect what is most important to us. So, reflecting on our values can help move us in the right direction. They influence our priorities, goals, and behaviors, helping us stay true to ourselves. We might value social connection, which allows us to see that what we want in life involves being around others. Or, we value kindness, which shows that what we want in life may be a career helping others. By aligning your actions with your values, you can create a sense of coherence and authenticity in your life, which is essential to better understanding your desires.
Identifying Personal Values
To identify your values, reflect on past experiences and consider what brought you the most satisfaction or pride. Are there specific principles that you consistently uphold, regardless of the situation? Once you’ve identified your values, use them as a guiding framework for making decisions and setting goals that align with your life purpose.
What activities do you get absorbed in?
Do you know that feeling when you are so absorbed in your work or activities that you lose track of time? That feeling is called flow—the positive sense of being connected to our performance (Jackson & Marsh, 1996). Flow occurs when we’re doing things we really love that are just the right fit for our skill level. Flow can reduce stress, increase productivity, and enhance creativity.
So, what are the activities in which you get super absorbed? Knowing the answer to this question can give you clues about what you want.
What would you do if you could do anything in life?
Imagine you have no limitations or constraints—what would you do with your life? I don’t like to get people’s hopes and expectations up too much—the truth is we won’t be able to reach every wildest dream we might think up. But on the flip side, we often place limits on our own potential that don’t need to be there. So, taking the time to acknowledge what you want can help you think about ways to move in that general direction.
What is the gestalt of your life?
Gestalt is German for “pattern,” “shape,” or “configuration.” In psychology, gestalt refers to the idea of a sort of picture—the different parts produce a whole. The concept applied to your life means considering how various aspects of your life—relationships, career, hobbies—come together to create a cohesive whole. So, when thinking about what we want, we may benefit from looking back and examining everything.
So ask yourself a few questions:
- What kind of life do you want to lead?
- What kind of feelings does this life have?
- How will the pieces fit together?
- What does it look like when you look at it from the outside?
Asking these questions helps you understand more about what you want in life.
Take-Home
Discovering your life purpose is an unmapped, deeply personal, and ongoing journey. Some even say the pursuit never ends. However, the quest doesn’t need to be stressful or exhausting—it’s exciting. You get to define and redefine your direction at each milestone. You can create a meaningful and fulfilling life by understanding what makes you happy, identifying your needs and values, and engaging in activities that resonate with you.
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